Emo Girl

It’s hard to say how I’ve been feeling lately.  There are so many emotions running through me.  Sadness, excitement, fear, happiness, worry…you name it and I think I’ve felt it in the last month.

The house in Grass Valley has sold.  It is sad to think of someone else living in it.  My grandparents bought it while it was still being built so they are the only people who have ever resided in it  It’s also exciting because my mom gets to buy a new house and Bobby and I get to move.  I’m not really looking forward to moving, nor do I want to live in house in Sun Valley, but I am excited about the prospect of being able to paint and do whatever we want to the place.  I’ve already started planning what colors I want to paint everything.  I need to start shopping for ceiling fans for the offices and accessories for the living room.

As of today my surgery is a week away.  I am excited and scared.  That’s all I really have to say about that.

I’m trying to make myself into a more positive person.  I’ve started a “Book of Inspiring Things” I which I just add anything that makes me smile.  I’ve added quotes, photos, and magazine cut outs thus far.  I am also using it to be a bit creative.  I pulled out some water colors and crayons the other day which is a bit silly sounding but was actually quite relaxing.

I’ve decided to change my major once again. Bobby has been suggesting Graphic Design to me for a long time and I didn’t think it’d be good for me.  I’ve thought about it a lot more lately and realize how right Bobby really is.  I thought I really wanted to do web design but I realized that I enjoyed making the graphics and whatnot more than the coding.  I hated coding.  Not to mention this stupid CIT class I am taking is making me see how difficult it really would be for me.  I looked over the classes I would need to take and I am actually getting excited!  My mom of course is worried I’ll never find a real job with it but I think I’d be miserable if I continue to pursue Information Technology.  The only reason I am even going to school is so that I can eventually get a job that I won’t hate.

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